5 Amusing Blonde Jokes You Don’t Wanna Miss

Here are some blonde jokes to brighten your day and also your face. We hope your day goes well.

Just try to understand the point at which they are emphasizing and you’ll understand the jokes

Another Suicide

A blonde decided to commit suicide by hanging herself from a tree in the park.

A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted her hanging from the tree. He asks the blonde what she is doing and she replies, “I’m hanging myself.” “You’re supposed to put the noose around your neck, not your waist,” said the onlooker. “I tried that,” replied the blonde, “but I couldn’t breathe.

Stupid report

A blonde gets in her car and notices her steering wheel, dashboard, and windshield is missing. She calls the police and reports a theft. When the police officer comes, he looks at the blonde who is crying and and says, “Maam…you’re sitting in the backseat…” [ READ ALSO: 10 Ways To Easily Forget About Your Ex ]

Blonde vs Blonde

One day a blonde was broke and didn’t know what to do. So she decided to kidnap a child. She went over to the play ground and saw plenty of little kids running around. She picked out this one little boy and went over and grabbed him. She told the little boy she was going to kidnap and the little boy knowing she was a blonde didn’t mind at all. The blonde wrote a note as the following:

To whom it may concern:

I have just kidnapped your little boy and I want one million dollars in a paper bag under the peach tree at noon.

Sincerely
a blonde

After she was finished the note she pinned the note to his shirt and sent home. The next day the blonde she went to the peach tree at noon and there was a brown paper bag. All the money was there but there was a little note. It said:

Dear a blonde:

Your money is all there I just wanted to know how you could do this to another blonde.

Dumb Ass Blonde

One day a blonde came home from school and came to her mother and said, “Hey, Mommy! Mommy! Today in school we learned to count. The other kids could only count to three but I can count to Ten….. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!” The mother responds, “Very good honey.” The blonde asks, “Is that because Im a blonde mommy?” And the mother responds, “Yes dear.” Next day the blonde came home and went to her mother and said, “Today in school we learned our ABCs! The other kids could only get to D but I can get to K! …. A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K!” The mother says, “Very good honey.” The blonde then asked. “Is that because Im a blonde, Mommy?” The mother responds, “Yes dear.” The third day the blonde come home from school and said to her mother, “Mommy today in school we went swimming! But I was the only one who had breasts. Is that because Im a blonde, Mommy?” And the mother responds, “No Honey, its because youre twenty five.”

 

What do you think?

A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out. The girls broke out and the brunette said, “Lets hide in that barn, theyll never find us.” So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down. The next morning, the cops said, “Come out with your hands in the air!” The red-head said, “Hide in those baskets, they’ll never find us!” So the Brunette got in the first one, the red-head got in the second one and the blonde got in the third one. Meanwhile, the cops were getting a ladder set up and trying to get up there. Once they got up, the seargent ordered them to kick the baskets. So the cop kicked the first one: “RUFF.” “Its just a damn dog!” yelled the cop. The cop kicked the next one: “MEOW.” “Its just a damn cat,” yelled the cop. The cop kicked the next basket and the blonde yelled, “POTATOES! Blonde Jokes – 5 Amusing Blonde Jokes You Don’t Wanna Miss, 5 Amusing Blonde Jokes, Blonde Jokes